Even before we began eating gluten-free, we avoided wheat and ate whole grains. When we moved into this house in the middle of August and needed freezer space, we pulled out the loaf of bread that was already in the freezer. We stuck it on a small table in the corner of the kitchen. At the time, I said maybe we could feed the ducks with it or something (thinking like a regular city person, ’cause the ducks out here are well-fed all on their own).

To be fair, I’m not completely certain that the bread-pulling occurred then. It may have happened as late as the Tuesday after the Labor Day weekend, when we finally settled in and needed the freezer space. Before that, we’d been on a roadtrip.

All of that to say it really makes me wonder what is actually in a loaf of Wonder Bread because that thing is still on that corner table waiting for ducks, and there is not a single spot of mold on it. Anywhere.

Sandwich, anyone?